Welcome back to the part of the calendar where SEC football doesn't exist yet but SEC football discourse never stops. Grab a sweet tea, stare into the void, and let's get into it.
First and most chaotic: Lane Kiffin arrived in Baton Rouge this winter like a man who had been saving receipts for years and finally got access to someone else's checkbook. He assembled what is being called the No. 1 transfer portal class in the country, headlined by former Arizona State quarterback Sam Leavitt — a dual-threat menace who led the Sun Devils to a Big 12 title in 2024 — for a reported $5 million in NIL and revenue share. He also grabbed ex-USC five-star Husan Longstreet as the heir apparent and Elon transfer Landen Clark as the depth piece, because apparently three portal QBs is the new normal. The roster now has roughly 64 new players, which is the same size as the NCAA Tournament field. Kiffin literally made that comparison himself, so you know he's already workshopping the media day material.
Here's the punchline: Leavitt, the $5 million man, could not participate in full-team drills this spring due to a foot injury he suffered at Arizona State last fall. He threw in 7-on-7. Seven. On. Seven. The man Kiffin flew to Knoxville to recruit in person, the man CBS Sports has already tabbed as a top-five SEC quarterback, spent spring practice watching Husan Longstreet take snaps against a defense he has never met. Kiffin said he's "in a really good place." Sure. The Tigers open against Clemson on September 5th. Clock is ticking, foot is healing, fanbase is vibrating at a frequency only dogs can hear.
Meanwhile, in Tuscaloosa, Kalen DeBoer is entering Year 3 in what has become the most exhausting coaching evaluation in college football. The numbers from 2025 are genuinely hard to read: 3.35 yards per carry, only 11 total rushing attempts all season that went for more than 15 yards, and a Rose Bowl quarterfinal in which Indiana — Indiana — beat them 38-3. The Tide got to the SEC title game and then lost to Georgia 28-7. This is not a program in freefall, but it is a program that forgot something fundamental about itself, specifically that it used to hit people in the mouth. DeBoer fired OL coach Chris Kapilovic, hired Adrian Klemm, overhauled the entire offensive line, and is now spending the spring telling anyone with a microphone that "everyone takes ownership" and they need to "run the football better." Hot takes from Josh Pate and Stephen A. Smith have already made the rounds. Alabama fans are doing what Alabama fans do when things aren't perfect, which is threaten to fire someone who just went to the College Football Playoff.
And just so Tennessee doesn't feel left out of the chaos: Phillip Fulmer came out this week — at his charity golf tournament, because where else — to say he opposes a 24-team College Football Playoff. Fine, normal opinion. Except Tennessee AD Danny White went on record last week at the Big Orange Caravan saying he wants 24 teams. So the legend and the suit are publicly feuding about a playoff format that hasn't been decided yet, while Greg Sankey sits in Birmingham nodding for 16 and the Big Ten lobbies for 24 with the energy of a conference that just got a $1.47 billion media deal and wants everyone to know about it.
The SEC: 87 NFL Draft picks this year, a record. The most dominant football conference in America. And somehow, every single May, it produces enough dysfunction to fill a podcast, a Reddit thread, and a small claims court docket. We wouldn't have it any other way.
