Happy October, everyone. The leaves are turning, the pumpkin spice is flowing, and the Southeastern Conference is absolutely losing its mind on schedule.
Let's start with the refs, because of course we do. The SEC announced Monday that Tennessee's successful drop-kick onside attempt with 1:22 remaining in Saturday's 20-17 loss to Texas was incorrectly officiated — the kick should have triggered a five-yard penalty and a replay of the down. Two violations, both caught on live television by every human being except the eight people being paid to enforce the rules. Tennessee punter Jackson Ross was allowed to drop-kick the ball from a yard behind the 35-yard line — which is illegal — and he also changed his lateral position after the ready-for-play signal, which is also illegal. The SEC 'regrets the error,' which is conference-speak for 'please stop emailing us.'
Texas safety Jelani McDonald bailed the whole operation out by batting away a Hail Mary, so instead of a full-blown national meltdown we got a Monday morning press release and a tidy little lesson in free-kick rules nobody asked for. Had Tennessee gone on to win the game after recovering an illegal onside kick, the SEC would've had a controversy akin to what the Big Ten dealt with after the Western Michigan-Michigan debacle. We were THIS close to Austin filing a restraining order against the entire officiating department. Tennessee head coach Josh Heupel pushed back on the SEC's ruling during his Monday availability, claiming that other conference teams have run that kick and that the Volunteers communicated with officials about it prior to the game. Sure, Josh. You told the refs. The refs nodded. The refs then forgot everything you said and waved off their own flag. Classic.
Meanwhile, Lane Kiffin is over in Baton Rouge conducting what can only be described as a one-man grievance press conference. Kiffin has been blunt that he believes playing nine conference games puts the SEC at a distinct disadvantage compared to other conferences like the ACC, the Big 12, and the Big Ten. His evidence? Kiffin is already blaming the SEC's new nine-game conference schedule for LSU's injuries, despite having played just two conference games so far. Two. He has played two conference games and is already demanding structural reform. LSU had just crushed Texas A&M 35-6, but apparently even a blowout comes with a scheduling complaint.
'Be careful what you wish for, SEC,' Kiffin told ESPN's Marty Smith — a warning delivered, mind you, after a 29-point beatdown in which he presumably had every opportunity to rest his players. College football fans were quick to mock the claim: 'They've played 3 games. Don't blame a schedule you haven't even played through,' one fan wrote. 'Lane you've been coaching in this conference for half your life, you knew exactly what 9 SEC games was gonna look like,' wrote another.
And the LSU-SEC legal saga, which has been draining the conference's dignity since before kickoff week, found a new chapter this week: the SEC says it is 'deeply disappointed' that LSU tried to dismiss its lawsuit against the university stemming from the whole ex-NFL-players-on-the-roster fiasco. Louisiana Attorney General Liz Murrill apparently filed a motion arguing the SEC's fears were 'self-inflicted.' At this point, both sides are paying lawyers to yell at each other while Kiffin finds new ways to complain about the calendar. The real losers are the rest of us, who just wanted to watch football.
Week 5 is here. Try to have fun.
