The SEC spring meetings at the Hilton Sandestin Resort wrapped up Thursday, and if you were hoping for clarity on the future of college football, congratulations — you got vibes. Mostly just vibes, and one very expensive lesson in who actually runs things.

It started Tuesday when Kirby Smart, two-time national champion and full-time chaos merchant, walked up to a podium on the Florida panhandle and essentially declared secession. "I've been a huge advocate that if we can't find rules that everybody plays by, then we should play our own," Smart told reporters. "I'm not afraid of that. I'm not afraid to break away and say that our conference is strong enough to go out and play." The college football internet lost what remained of its mind. Iowa State AD Jamie Pollard fired back — "Let them break away. We should break away from them" — which is a very Iowa State way to stumble into the most important conversation in sports. Sir, you are the Iowa State of this argument.

By Thursday, the SEC presidents and chancellors had issued a formal statement reaffirming the conference's intent to retain full control of its media rights, pushing back hard against language in the Protect College Sports Act that would allow pooling rights across conferences. So yes: the SEC is out here drafting the Articles of Confederation Part Two while simultaneously being stitched to ESPN like a conjoined twin that generates $710 million a year.

Which brings us to the funniest story of the week, buried under all the secession thunder. Arkansas AD Hunter Yurachek — the CFP chairman, do not forget this — went scorched-earth public about the Razorbacks getting scheduled for a 9:15 p.m. CT kickoff at Utah on September 12, only to play Georgia at home at 11 a.m. the following Saturday. He called it a "genuine welfare issue" for his players. He called it "unacceptable." He called out ESPN by name. It was genuinely righteous.

Then Greg Sankey stepped to the mic and explained, with the resignation of a man reading his own eulogy, that the SEC had already complained about the scheduling before it was announced. ESPN had heard the concerns and issued those concerns a polite shrug. "We have communicated the displeasure in advance," Sankey said. "It hasn't changed. That's one of those points of authority that are given to our broadcast partner."

So to recap: The SEC wants to break away from the NCAA. The SEC wants to control its own destiny. The SEC president and its coaches are talking like Revolutionary War generals. And Greg Sankey cannot get ESPN to move a football game that involves a team traveling across three time zones. The deal runs through 2034. Arkansas is going to be very, very tired.

The conference that wants to secede from college athletics cannot secede from a morning kickoff. God bless this sport.